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Wednesday, May 4, 2011

It is a beautiful day in Oregon...

I am writing a quick entry on my blog to say hello to any hapless reader. I do not intend on neglecting my blog. I am incredibly busy with details of my Help us Return Home ReUnification Project. I am changing cell phone companies and will need to start from scratch on this detail. So it is a minor delay.   But a delay all the same. Peace...BigMamaBlaze

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Pink


For my beautiful daughter Clara! I love you darling...

Monday, April 11, 2011

So, Another day passes waiting the outcome of many exciting events...


I have in my life time, as have many others, waited for exciting events to unfold. I have stated before I was born pre-ICWA (Indian Child Welfare Act). I was also born in San Francisco, CA and my mother is FBI (Full Blooded Indian) Lake Cowichan First Nation, B.C., Canada. I am what is considered first generation off the rez. I have finally made contact with a man name George Day who is a social worker for our nation, as well as other neighboring nations, if I understand correctly, and this nice man is going to help me after 32 years of waiting and wondering, to figure my way through to red tape the government ties our race up with so well. Especially my generation and anyone born pre-ICWA and adopted into a neighboring country. When adoption happen over boarders, it is a very effective way of wiping, forever, off the grid, our status, our respect we deserve from uh, say small town or big town local authorities. Respect from our own people sometimes. I attended some college and witnessed friends return to their rez's after school to be rejected by their own people. Education for Extinction is an excellent book and can give many insights as to the inter generational PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) many indigenous and first nation peoples suffer today.
This PTSD is often misunderstood and can be severe. I have been discriminated against and stigmatized my entire life. Even by my own adoptive family, the family I married into, and especially the community in which I feel so trapped in today. It is a very lonely feeling to experience these things and to top that off, I have an individual in my life that has used these very things as weapons against me. I wrote an article called "Hate Whisperers", for the very reason that I have experienced and witnessed a person who I call a "Hate Whisperer" commit these very calculated and intentional inflictions against me.
The saddest part of all of that nonsense is the effect it has had on my daughter. Who is, I believe the "Hate Whisperer's" actual target. Sick people in this world I have witness many cruel and inhumane things, but to actually witness the teaching of intolerance and jealously and for personal and financial gain. It hurt my heart so bad at one point, I actually went to my Dr. and described what I was experiencing and asked if perhaps that person was right, that I was indeed "crazy"? The kindest words I have heard in many years came from a man who has known me only over a year. These kind words relieved almost an entire lifetime of pain.
From time to time, I still get lost in pain and darkness, as I do not understand the reasons this world is the way it is most of the time. I do not understand why Americans believe the division scare tactics pumped into T.V.'s, newspapers, etc. I am quicker to come out of that darkness today. For I have eliminated most of the "Hate Whisperers" in my life.
Today I offer myself to the task I believe I was assigned before I was even born. This task is to be a strong enough person to speak what I see and hear, not what people say. I listen to behaviors and speak to others to do the same.

It is time America! It is time to UNITE and no longer be weakened by division. It can wait no longer. It is a simple idea, it is not my idea, I claim no such originality. I do say that it is when "We the People" can stand united again, we will succeed faster than imaginable. It matters not your religious affiliation, or political affiliations, socio economical status, sexual orientation, or race, creed, color, nothing, only a willingness to mind only your own business, quiet yourself and stand together with your neighbor. Once this is accomplished peacefully and without violence, the world will shift immediately.
If we choose soon it is still not too late. However, if we do not awaken from this trance, we will surely be consumed by fears. I know no man or woman who acts with right mind when consumed with fear. Quite the opposite, it is a person consumed with fear, especially for a length of time to effect one's belief and faith in the divinity of the universe, that many dark thing come to pass. I have witnessed in my own family darkness consume members and seen act committed by my loved ones, I wouldn't have ever believed imaginable. I stand strong in my faith that I will say over and over each day....

It's Time America!!! It's time to slow each day and make each decision with our 7th generation children in mind. If we all did this each day, the world would not stop, although it may seem like it at first to those addicted to stress and racing around, and the idea that production of anything is somehow in direct proportion to one's honor and survival. The signs, of the Christians, are everywhere, the prophecies of many cultures interpreted by the anthropologists and scientists that have no faith in oral traditions who have lost the answers along the way because of this lack of belief in people to kept knowledge sacredness and wisdom. The wisdom keepers who passed down their knowledge through story telling, dancing and songs, art, tattooing, and many other "non written language ways". The tribes that believed in strength by keeping generations bridged together not just a means of survival, but of stewardship and witnessing each other's deeds to keep each other safe.

Outside, outside, outside, so many look outside of themselves for answers that are inside of them and have been there since before they were born. The soul stores knowledge and our voices can sing or enchant, or whisper, or silently through actions only teach our children all they need to know. It is the wisdom of ages and elders that we let rot in retirement homes? Why? This is not for today's journal entry. I will be the broken record, as some need to hear something a thousand times before, they believe or remember, I will be the broken record that will remind America, It's time to awaken. Peace...BigMamaBlaze (and no, I am not crazy, but even some of times most crazy people have changed history forever, so maybe it's not such a bad thing to be crazy?)